I Almost Backed Out From My Biggest Stage
I thought about backing out from my biggest stage 😮
Here’s a story and mindset lesson that I haven’t shared before.
Over 1,500 people in that hall watched me perform one of my best speeches to date, and it almost didn’t happen.
I was stoked to be one of the few to be invited to speak on Andy Frisella’s and Ed Mylett’s stage, at the Arete Syndicate Live.
I spent weeks planning my speech and the message I wanted to deliver to the audience. My constant thought was how I’d be able to positively impact them.
I showed up the evening before the event to catch up with the hundreds of people I’d grown closer to, in that group.
We spent hours in that huge hotel lobby, sharing stories and hugs. The energy in that room is still something I vividly remember. Everyone was excited to be there.
Even though I didn’t stay up too late, my mind was buzzing and I couldn’t sleep. As I lay in bed, I was revisiting earlier conversations and also rehearsing segments of my speech. Mental stimulation overload was an understatement.
Couple that to the anxiety of knowing I’d soon be standing on the largest stage I’d ever been on… and wanting to deliver a great performance to people I respected.
It seemed that every hour I’d look over at the alarm clock, watching each hour wasted from resting. 1AM, 2AM, 3AM, etc… I couldn’t sleep.
I think I dozed off about 2 hrs before the alarm clock woke me up. It felt like I only slept 20 minutes. What a rough realization.
That’s when the negative internal voice started to creep in…
“You’re not ready to do this.”
“You’re going to bomb if you get up on that stage.”
I dragged my feet to the restroom and turned on the shower. Caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. Eyes were red, dark circles under my eyes, all the evidence of being exhausted.
The voice said:
“It’s okay if you want to back out. They’ll understand.”
“Just tell them you aren’t feeling well.”
About halfway through that shower, hearing more voices telling me to quit, I caught myself and became aware of this downward spiral.
My own internal voice took over.
“Fuck that. I’m not quitting!”
“I’m going to get on that stage and give the best speech of my life.”
“And, I’m going to do it without any sleep.”
“Performing while hurt. That’ll be a cool story when I pull it off.”
I was smiling by then. Later on, I killed it on that stage. Nobody knew how exhausted I was.
Ask yourself how many times you’ve let that inner bitch voice win. Excuses are plentiful and easy, but earning results is not.
Catch yourself. Change the narrative. Play hurt. Win.🔥
